Tuesday, August 30, 2011

no, I didn't have a stroke

My dentist may have been a little overzealous with the Novocain. I am still numb from my forehead to my neck from my lunchtime appointment.

My arms hurt from the death grip I had on the armrests of the torture chair. What on earth possesses a person to become a dentist? The Nazis aren’t hiring anymore, I guess.

At one point, while I was trying not to focus on that god awful wail of a noise coming out of the drill, I noticed that my lip was sort of pinched between his finger and my front teeth. “That would hurt if I could feel it,” I thought to myself.

Then I couldn’t help but laugh at myself when it occurred to me that if I could feel it, my lip would be the least of my worries.

BUT! While we were in there taking care of my new cavity (aren’t I a little old to be getting new cavities???) we swapped out my old metal fillings for the nice tooth colored ones. My molars look freaking awesome!!!


Petit fleur said...

"What on earth possesses a person to become a dentist? The Nazis aren’t hiring anymore, I guess"

You crack my ass up! I wonder that too... also proctologists. I guess the world needs them, but still, what
DOES posses those people to pursue these as careers!?

Happy you have new toothy molars. I've been wanting to get mine replaced for years.


Sarcastic Bastard said...

Nobody likes the damn dentist.

I still get cavities occasionally at 45.

You know I love you, Steph.


All This Trouble... said...

Not to be outdone, I have a new cavity myself! I had no idea you could swap for tooth colored fillings. You are a wealth of information!

Steph(anie) said...

PF - I wonder if proctologists are embarassed to tell people their specialties?

SB - I thought cavities were like acne and we would just grow out of them... neither in my case unfortunately.

ATT - You would only want to do it in the same quadrant as the one where you will be getting the new filling, most likely. Like if it's your lower jaw on the right side, you could ask them about any old fillings in that same area. My dentist doesn't like to numb up both sides of your mouth at once. Although he didn't seem to mind numbing the entire right side of my body. For a minute when I was leaving his office, I debated whether I could feel my right foot well enough to drive.

Ms. Moon said...

I would trade all of my fillings for gold if I could. I want tooth jewelry. That phrase Ms. Fleur quoted cracked me up too.

Angella Lister said...

i need to go to the dentist. your thought processes around the drill are very funny.

Petit fleur said...

Good question Steph...

Yea Alice, forward all my messages to my mobile phone. I'll be at the big international asshole Dr. convention next week!

It just never gets old, does it?

Mwa said...

I need to go to the dentist. Last time I had a crick in my neck from being so tense. I need SO much work done, dammit. Also the white fillings like you. Ech.

Maggie May said...

this post cracked me up! i think your lip WOULD be the least of your worries :) and i love that the last sentence is 'my molars look freaking awesome!'