Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Greetings from Planet Stephanie

“She is in her own little world,” they would say of me. I don’t hear people when they call my name as I walk through the parking lot. I don’t recognize people I’ve known for years when I meet them on the street.

I am in my own little world.

Or. I am my own little world. My own planet.

My body feels so heavy lately. I exercise, but even a short period of exercise takes all I have to give. There is an inverse relationship between my mass and the speed and which I can move through space.

Gravity is the means by which objects with mass attract one another. I lose objects when sitting on the couch because they roll toward me and rest where my thighs meet the cushion, out of my line of sight.

The force and sound of my breath rivals a hurricane.

There is no spring in my step, only a thud.

I wonder when I will reach critical mass and implode, becoming invisible. A black hole. Antimatter.

Poof.

6 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Oh Sweetie.
Would it help if I told you that this is so beautifully written? Probably not. But it is.

Mwa said...

Big hug to you...

Maggie May said...

this is a beautifully written post. and so painful. please take care of yourself and let those that love you take care of you also.you are not antimatter...and will not become that...your gravity is more than your physical weight, it is your spirit and heart and mind and it can attract what you need.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I'm fat and tired, too. Your labels crack me up.

I don't like to exercise or even move for that matter.

But I happen to love youse. So there.

Have a great long weekend.

michelle said...

Don't disappear. K?

xoxoxo

Bethany said...

I getcha buddy.
Great writing.
Just keep moving.
You will feel better.
Really.
You're doing great.